That day

That day arrived.  The one where you catch you breath after seeing the large white envelope in the mail.  Where your fingers can't move fast enough to open it, and your vision blurs instantly with the tears.  She's been matched.

Fourteen months in the kennel, three separate trainers, several sightings by me, and she's done with it all.  Off to live the life she was bred for, giving "independence and dignity" to the blind person she now calls her own.

Few people understand this feeling of loss, and pride simultaneously.  No one finds it easy to give them back, NO ONE.  It's why The Seeing Eye struggles to find families willing to raise their puppies.  There's a searing sense of emptiness for days, even weeks following their departure.  Why not just avoid it all together?  Why even raise a puppy if you'll not see them again?  Sacrifice, that's why.

This culture of ours has lost the art of sacrifice.  Webster's defines it as : "forfeiture of something highly valued for the sake of one thought to have a greater value or claim."  Raising Ester was a true lesson in sacrifice for our family.  Time, energy, resources, and emotion were invested into her daily.  Did the kids want to go out and play?  Absolutely, but Ester had to be exercised first.  Do we want to go away for the weekend?  Sure, but we had to find dog care for her or we couldn't go.  Ultimately, giving her back to The Seeing Eye meant relinquishing any hold we had on her as a family member.  Her purpose, her role in the future COULD NOT happen without our seeing her future blind person as more valuable than ANY desire we had to keep her.  This is the essence of sacrifice.  Whatever I desire surrounding that puppy, must be less than my desire to see her change a life.

 I'm saddened by the cultural shift in our thinking, as of late.  When raising these puppies, the first question is always- "how do you do it- the giving up?" Why must strangers see the parting as the pivotal moment we raisers have?  There are thousands of moments that define the relationship we build with our puppies.  Hours of training, and exposure, and of course, love, go into making them well rounded and adventurous. The shame is in wiping out all of those moments, for the one that is the hardest.  When we allow hard moments to keep us from doing good, and right for others, we have welcomed selfishness in it's place.

That's not the kind of place I want my home to be.  So we press on, loving that fact that we have successfully raised a working Seeing Eye dog. 

"Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others as more significant than yourselves." Philippians 2:3

Things to know about Labs

She's only our second Labrador Retriever, so in no way can be called professional in regards to them. We have two kids, and trust me, we're not pros there either.

That being said, there are distinct breed characteristics that you will find in every Lab, and some of those are displayed more strongly in one dog than the other.

According to several sources, the Labrador Retriever is one the "easiest breeds to train" .  Can you hear my laughter?  Folks, there is NO dog that is EASY to train- they all require work, consistency, and hours of effort.  At all times as a pet parent you must keep the end product you desire in view.  If you want a happy, well behaved dog, then you have to ensure that through obedience training, and PRACTICE.

There's been no lack of training going on around here, but she possesses a certain stubbornness that is challenging.  Easy breed, remember?  Right...

Our memories have gone a bit soft since January.  The kids keep mentioning how perfect Ester was, and I was quick to remind us all that she wasn't.  After listing some of her foibles, she quickly fell from the pedestal.  How easily we forget.

Cinnamon is four months old now, and proven over and over that she is a Lab.  For entertainment purposes, I give you the following:

1) EVERY thing that is left on the floor, toy or otherwise, makes it into her mouth.
2) A water bowl is just a small swimming pool.
3) A meal is NEVER missed, and if it ever is, you KNOW something is wrong.
4) A gate is an invitation to jump.
5) You can never have too many friends; dogs or people.
6) Alarm clocks are antiquated.  You will never sleep in again.
7) You can plan for every outcome and she will find the one you didn't.
8) When the doorbell rings, it must be for her.
9) Love is always better when it's given away.

Dear Children

Dear Children of Mine,

I love you dearly.  Parents say this to their children all the time, but what does it really mean?  In terms you can understand, let me explain.

IT DOESN'T MEAN I'M GOING TO DO THE WORK FOR YOU-
When your father or I ask you to do a job, we expect YOU to do it, and in a timely fashion.  Letting the job wait until the end of the day in hopes we'll forget or do it ourselves, is not going to happen.  Not only is our memory still sharp, but you are a bonafide member of this family, and that membership comes with it's own reward- contributing to the running of this household.  No slackers allowed.

IT DOESN'T MEAN WE DO WHAT EVERYONE ELSE DOES-
You may be the only children for miles around that are helping with yard work, but that doesn't change our minds.  Truthfully, it only solidifies what we're doing.  We refuse to add to the generation of entitlement.  Listen carefully- HARD WORK NEVER HURT ANYONE.  Nothing good was ever achieved by being lazy, and the hours of lawn mowing, raking, weeding, and trimming will only serve you in the long run.

IT DOES MEAN A LIFE OF SACRIFICE-
The greatest example of love we have is found in Christ, and we aim to be His ambassadors in what we say and do.  From helping others in our neighborhood, to raising a Seeing Eye puppy, or bringing meals to those in need, we look for ways to put others first as Christ did for us.  This may mean stretching ourselves from time to time.  It may mean missing out on a favorite activity.  You can NEVER go wrong in loving someone this way.

IT MEANS GIVING YOU FREEDOM A LITTLE BIT AT A TIME-
When you can be trusted with a little, then you will be trusted with a lot.  A simple principle.  We parent inside the funnel, meaning, we give you a bit of leeway at a time, since too much too soon can be detrimental.  It would be careless for us as parents to leave you for a weekend by yourselves (and against the law).  An hour alone, however, is reasonable at this stage and allows you to grow into the freedom.  If at any time that small bit of freedom is abused, we reign it back in, until we see the trust regained.

IT MIGHT MEAN GOING WITHOUT-
Certain items that are deemed "necessary" in our culture really aren't.  We've been sold a bill of goods, and the payment will come due in the next generation of people who can't communicate face to face yet can text at the speed of lightning.  Your youth should not be filled with all the latest gadgets.  Instead, you should be reading, running around in our yard, playing with the puppy and hanging out with friends.  All this technology only serves to keep us connected ALL THE TIME, which is far from beneficial.

And that my loves, is just a few examples of how we're trying our best to love you.  God willing, one day you'll understand it all.  For now, just know we love you.

XO

The first 3 weeks

Summer has arrived in all it's glory- great weather, fireflies, late nights, BBQ's and walks around the neighborhood after dinner.  Winter isn't so bad when you have weeks like this.

Then there's the early mornings.  Normally, I'm a morning person.  Rising before the rest of the family to enjoy a hot cup of coffee and do my devotions, is my favorite way to begin the day.  Come summer however, I like to have a bit of a respite from the earliness.

Enter Cinnamon.

She doesn't know it's summer.  Nor does she know she's supposed to let me sleep in.  You can see my dilemma.

Just when my kids have reached the age when they sleep in, we go and get a puppy.  Remind me again whose idea this was?

She's been a delightful little girl; mellow as they come, aside from a few times a day when she's playful.  The crate is a lifesaver for those moments.  Most of the day she's sleeping.  Around here, that's known as recharging.

While most of the time she's angelic (see the picture above), she has earned the nickname "Jaws".  It fits.

When she began sleeping on our bed night the third night (the softie?  Not me.) I knew we'd regret it eventually.  Fast forward three weeks, and we have us a BIG problem.  Little miss doesn't want to be in her crate overnight and voices her opinion rather loudly.

The kids aren't about to transition her.  Nelson isn't either.  The lucky winner is me.  Do you see how my summer is stacking up thus far?

Down to the basement we go where she can whine without fear of waking anyone else.  Her incessant whining and barking lasted for 45 minutes straight.  STRAIGHT.  And just so you know, earplugs aren't worth a darn in this case.  <sigh>  I'm exhausted.  Even better is that she's up and raring to go at 5:30 am.  God love her.

Each night gets a little better, and each morning she's learning to wait a bit longer for me to rise and shine.

Until she decides sleeping in is a good thing, I'll be enjoying that early cup of coffee with her.
It doesn't hurt that she sleeps on my lap while I do that.  Puppy love it is.

The Bee

It's not a coincidence that a kid who LOVES Geography ends up at a school that participates in the National Geographic Geography Bee.  We didn't know this at the time we picked the school.

That's purely a God thing.

As we headed down to D.C. the excitement in the car was palpable.  Plenty of chatter, much quizzing, and of course, a few prayers thrown in too.  It didn't hurt, that en route, we stopped to pick out the puppy that's soon to join our brood.  If nothing else, this face distracted us from any stress we might have had:

And no, she's not named yet.  A point of contention around here.

Our experience over the week was certainly unique.  Charlie roomed with two other contestants, giving us a short glimpse of life in the future, when he's off to college.  Audrey soaked up the extra attention from us both.  He learned that being away from your parents might be kind of cool, but roommates present a different set of challenges all together.  I'm sure you can relate.

As for the competition itself, he disappointed himself in that he made an error on one of the questions.  In giving the country, not the name of the island, he missed the point.  He composed himself well throughout, and it was obvious to me as his mother, that prayers were being answered for humility and good recall.  Out of the eleven contestants in our room (there were 5 rooms in total), three scored perfectly and moved on to the finals.  With ten spots available for the finals, nine of those spots were filled with kids who scored perfectly in the preliminaries.  The competition was stiff.

Given the circumstances, I do think he did his best.  There was no sense of what to expect, other than one would be competing against the best in each state.  The types of questions were unlike any he'd had previously, adding an element of difficulty.  

I'm so proud of him for his effort, but even more so for his character.  Not once did I ever hear him say anything negative or condescending.  It would be easy to get lost in the sorrow of losing, but he didn't. He was excited to see the others compete, and see if he knew the answers.

When all is said and done, Charlie walked away learning more about himself and how God answers prayers.  He heard the winner talk about how much time he spends studying for this, and Charlie was frank in his response of "I'd have no life if I did that".  I'm so thankful he has a sense of balance and priority at this age. 

All in all, it was a once in a lifetime opportunity for us all, and we are grateful to have been there.

Team Charlie

We're on our way down to Washington D.C. today.

My pom-poms and cheerleading voice are ready.
My prayers have been prayed.
My excitement, building.

It's time to fly, dear son.

Six weeks have flown by, and Charlie has impressed me, once again.  Forget for a minute all the knowledge he's had to retain.  The kid took 6 different sources and compiled information from each, into a notebook arranged alphabetically by nation.  In total, he put 150 nations in his notebook.  Can you name 150 of ANYTHING?  Day by day he's poured over the book, studying everything he's written down.  Combined with a nightly watching of "Jeopardy", he now believes he's sufficiently prepared.

It could be so easy to get wrapped up in the worldly trappings that accompany an event like this; success, pride, entitlement and money.  From these eyes, thankfully, there is an entirely different perspective.  This bee isn't really about the Bee.  It rarely is.

 You wonder, what is it about then?

Growing spiritually.  We have not because we ask not.  I'm not going to lie, I'd love to see my son win. It'd be a delightful moment for me as a mom.  But that's not at all what I've prayed for him the last six weeks.  God hasn't called me to pray for that.  He HAS called me to pray for his humility, ease in recall of all the facts he's learned, and that He would be glorified throughout.  Even better, is asking Charlie  what he wants prayed.  His answer?  That the other contestants wouldn't be proud.  He saw some aspects of character in the state competition that disgusted him, and it made an impression.  We've had some tough conversations about what to expect from this event.  Not all of it is pretty.  Charlie knows he's called to act and speak differently as a representative of his Creator, and this family.  Certainly it won't be easy for him, given that the level of competition will be high.  His ability to pray won't be hindered at any moment; he knows from experience that our God is present and able to help in times of need.

Charlie himself has been praying that he does his best.  I think that's all we can ask.  No goals are set this time.  Just the plan of going in and enjoying oneself.  I'd liken it to running a marathon.  Weeks of time and effort spent preparing, and you eventually make it to the starting line.  The race is the easy part; the training is all behind you.  Enjoy the scenery, soak up the crowds, and finish strong knowing you've put in the effort it takes to complete such a race.  Charlie is about to learn that the outcome is really a small part of what's going to take place this week.  God is going to use him in ways he can't expect.  God is going to grow him in places he needs it.  God is going to answer prayer.

The hardest part will be the waiting.

"Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think.."  Eph 3:20


Go Lord!

There she is!

We saw Ester today. 

For the last time.  

It was awful saying goodbye to her back in January.  Today was a different sort of awful.  More permanent.  

Every one of my Seeing Eye friends who has done this, says seeing them in harness is indescribable.  There's such a sense of pride in seeing the finished product.  Truthfully, I went into it with mixed emotions, this being our first experience.  

Her instructor brought her out in harness and I did a double take.  Our goofy, sweet girl, was transformed into this beautiful, strong working dog.  Right in full view.  There is no proper way to be prepared for such a sight. EVER.  The only response I could give was to let the tears flow.  When I turned around to see Charlie, I'm fairly certain his eyes had watered too.  My quiet reserved boy had been changed by her.  

We followed her through town, jumping in and out of puddles on this rainy spring day.  She never wavered, and the water didn't bother her.  Afterwards, the instructor spoke to us about her and the challenges she faced.  They expect her to be matched up with someone in the next month or two and will keep us apprised of her progress in that regard.

What a blessing to get closure.  In life, things are rarely wrapped up neatly.  This is one exception.  We raised her, we loved her, and sent her off to do great things.  Then, we have the privilege of seeing it all come full circle and witness her in harness.  

Along the way, people have often told me "I don't know how you do it, it must be so difficult to give them back."  Yes, yes it is.  But the purpose is greater than the pain.  It disappoints me greatly that so many would opt out of doing something great, all because it's "too difficult".  Nothing great was ever achieved taking the easy route.

I'd rather do the hard right thing, than the easy wrong thing.  

To Ester.

To loving others.

To doing the hard right thing.